Do you tell your kids to say ‘Yes/No m’am/sir’? This is one parenting thing I don’t enforce too much, and here’s why:
As much as I love being respected by my daughter, I find it hard to enforce the “yes m’am, yes sir” rule (Oh and for short, I’m going to stick with “yes m’am”, and for even shorter, YM). My family taught my brother and me to say YM only with strangers, teachers, other adults etc. but not to Mom and Dad. Mom’s reason?
We are your parents, and I didn’t want you and your brother to feel like you couldn’t approach us.
And I agree with her here. I never felt fearful talking to my parents. I never worried too much about saying the wrong thing to them. They were always open and loving. With my family, we have a kind of mutual respect: do as your told- no ifs ands or buts about it. Whyyyyy? Because “I’m your parent! And you need to respect me.” With that I’ve grown to be a firm believer that words mean nothing if they aren’t followed by an equivalent action. I could say YM all day to Mom, but does that mean I respect her? No. Not at all. But they were strict about saying YM to others who were unfamiliar. And I never did stray from that. I need to respect people I don’t know, but I won’t interact with them enough to show them that respect, so the YM is more necessary.
Hmm… Maybe I could hear some thoughts on this subject. I would love to know all the sides to it and why YM is a good thing to enforce.